~BeautifulAngel~
21 years old
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SCAC Cerebral Palsy Center
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Tuesday, April 29, 2008
The feelings that we hold.
Remember tonight, for it is the beginning of always. A promise. Like a reward for persisting through life so long alone. A belief in each other and the possibility of love. A decision to ignore, simply rise above the pain of the past. A covenant, which at once binds two souls and yet severs prior ties. A celebration of the chance taken and the challenge that lies ahead. For two will always be stronger than one, like a team braced against the tempest civil world. And love will always be the guiding force in our lives. For tonight is mere formality. Only an announcement to the world of feelings long held. Promises made long ago. In the sacred spaces of our hearts.
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Living In Both Worlds??
"I come in here and I sit in silence and hear the echoes of who we used to be. And so I wish for patience, and grace, and strength to just let him be happy. Mostly I pray for the strength to not make his life worse because of what I want. That's the toughest part, letting go, you know? That's the part of grace that really sucks."
There are so many times I feel in this way. Its not about the giving up or letting go, but its about how much I can endure in this journey. There are so many things that I have to give up but I sit and wonder if its all worth it. I know it is but somehow you make me feel like I am doing a wrong thing altogether. I really need the strength to keep going on and do the things that please you. I really need the patience to make this relationship work. I miss those times where everything was just new, everything was about fun and going through life as it is. But now, I do not even know what is fun.
"Make a wish and place it in your heart. Anything you want, everything you want. Do you have it? Good. Now believe it can come true. You never know where the next miracle is gonna come from, the next smile, the next wish come true. But if you believe that it's right around the corner, and you open your heart and mind to possibility of it, to the certainty of it. You just might get the thing you're wishing for. The world is full of magic. You just have to believe in it. So make your wish. Do you have it? Good. Now believe in it, with all your heart..."
"You got a dream go get it. Do not let anyone get to you on that. If you know you can achieve it, go get it. Period."
Sunday, April 06, 2008
Does It All Matter?
I have always wondered why is it that it's so much easier to forgive a stranger than someone you love? Is it cause a stranger is a person we care less about and his/her actions do not hurt us. On the other hand, the ones we loved most cuts us deep with his/her actions and its hard to forgive and forget. I can say that I will forgive but forgetting is a whole different thing altogether. I guess I have grown so much to think of things in a different angle, but at times what the other person does still hurts the same. We talk and come to a solution but how long will that last? Will ego take over and change the relationship again or will both parties learn from it and make it better? Each individual is entirely different and can never be compared. I personally hate to be compared to others as I know no one can be like me and vice versa.
Anyway there was another question on my mind, which I have shared in my previous post about love. You can drive at 16, go to war at 18, drink at 21, and retire at 65. So who can say what age you have to be to find your true love? Can anyone answer me?? I guess someday, when we are ready you will meet that person and somehow you will know that person is the right one for u and you go with the flow. When you go searching for something, you might not find it cause your heart is not in the right place to feel the right feeling. It may just be a seeking or a lonely heart but it will not be a pure and true one. So there is no right age for true love and there never will be. Like I said, everyone single one of us is different and unique.
Have you ever wondered what marks our time here? If one life can really make an impact on the world? Or if the choices we make matter? I believe they do. And I believe that one man can change many lives... for better or worse! After working at the Cerebral Palsy Center for 6 months plus, I am seeing everything in a whole new way and I know that a small gesture can go a very long way. I had to be tapped on my back to get me back on track to the real reason why I was working at that school by someone. Every single moment there is a blessing and I can never explain the feeling when I see the kids smile, acknowledge (although they do not know u) and improve even a little tiny bit. You have to be there to understand it. So its no harm going a little bit further for someone in need.
Happiness comes in many forms -- in the company of good friends, in the feeling you get when you make someone else's dream come true, or in the promise of hope renewed. It's okay to let yourself be happy because you never know how fleeting that happiness might be. I am glad I have found my happiness and I can strongly say that this relationship has a very great impact on my life that I seriously forgot how I was living one year ago. And I am happy to stand beside the one I love and my family, to see them achieve what they wanna do and support them in every way possible. I am glad I have a family who cares for me so much and a dotting boyfriend who has taught me so many things in this one year. I love all of you and thanks for all the happiness you have brought to my life!!
Anyway there was another question on my mind, which I have shared in my previous post about love. You can drive at 16, go to war at 18, drink at 21, and retire at 65. So who can say what age you have to be to find your true love? Can anyone answer me?? I guess someday, when we are ready you will meet that person and somehow you will know that person is the right one for u and you go with the flow. When you go searching for something, you might not find it cause your heart is not in the right place to feel the right feeling. It may just be a seeking or a lonely heart but it will not be a pure and true one. So there is no right age for true love and there never will be. Like I said, everyone single one of us is different and unique.
Have you ever wondered what marks our time here? If one life can really make an impact on the world? Or if the choices we make matter? I believe they do. And I believe that one man can change many lives... for better or worse! After working at the Cerebral Palsy Center for 6 months plus, I am seeing everything in a whole new way and I know that a small gesture can go a very long way. I had to be tapped on my back to get me back on track to the real reason why I was working at that school by someone. Every single moment there is a blessing and I can never explain the feeling when I see the kids smile, acknowledge (although they do not know u) and improve even a little tiny bit. You have to be there to understand it. So its no harm going a little bit further for someone in need.
Happiness comes in many forms -- in the company of good friends, in the feeling you get when you make someone else's dream come true, or in the promise of hope renewed. It's okay to let yourself be happy because you never know how fleeting that happiness might be. I am glad I have found my happiness and I can strongly say that this relationship has a very great impact on my life that I seriously forgot how I was living one year ago. And I am happy to stand beside the one I love and my family, to see them achieve what they wanna do and support them in every way possible. I am glad I have a family who cares for me so much and a dotting boyfriend who has taught me so many things in this one year. I love all of you and thanks for all the happiness you have brought to my life!!