~beautifulangel~ People who are meant to be together, ALWAYS find their way in the end!!

If it fair? Is anything fair in this world?? I do not know if I am doing it out of love or just for the sake of avoiding things from happening. But I guess there is always a limit to everything. Am I always at fault? Am I just a person you can show your anger and tantrums on? I feel exhausted!! Seriously. Try being on my end and you will know how I feel.

Sometimes anger and frustrations is constantly shown on me, that I bring myself so down and do not know where I stand anymore. Somehow or another I try very hard to be up again, but time and time again I fall down?? Are you there to pick me up, or are you the reason to make me fall once again?

I do not know! I seriously think that I am to blame for loads of things. I do not know if you are truely happy or just putting on a front to make everyone else happy. This is suppose to be the best day, but it turned out to something else! I am quite upset. But I cant show it cause it will be very wrong and I will be blamed for it too. So I just sit here and write it out!! And even shed tears along.

I can never really express how I really feel and it sucks so much. I am a person who constantly needs to share my emotions, but I am a totally different person who keeps everything inside. I am seriously lost in my own world, where I think of so many things that I do not normally think about.

Please do not let me fall too deep! Please do not push me off the cliff! If I really do fall so hard, I would not know what to do and I may be turned the other way round. I am really upset now and loads of things bothering me. I do not share with you how I feel cause I think that does not matter to you. So I keep mum and cry silently. Please help me before I am gone forever.

I really do love you and I do not know how to make sure you have enough. I seriously do not know what is enough at all. I am really lost. Lost in my own world!!!

lilBeautifulangel12:51 AM

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Thursday, December 04, 2008

The yearnings of my heart.

Are you really going to go away for a month? I am supportive, but I guess its a sudden decision and I think I am not prepared. No matter what decisions you make, I will support and stand by you. I am just missing you loads.

I know you are doing it for the greater benefits of the both of us. Like I said I am just not prepared but I will be. I know its for us and I know things will be better. It is also a test for us to see the strength and endurance of our relationship. I guess one month is pretty short, compared to years.

I will support you dada, I will always be here for you like you are for me. Thanks for always thinking about us and our future together. It makes me really very happy and proud of who i fell in love with. You have done so much in your ability to make this relationship a strong and better one. Everyone falls and they pick themselves up, but in this relationship we have always been there for one another and that makes the whole relationship great!!

I will never trade this for anything else in the world. The things you have done for me, the gifts you have bought me, the extend you go to make me happy, its all priceless.
I just want to say I love you with all my ''small'' heart.
Come back soon and safely =)

lilBeautifulangel4:29 PM

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Why do I feel like that??

The yearnings of my heart.